REFLECTIONS

I rarely look into the mirror

Not that I hate how I look

I'm just too grateful for having a perfect face and body

I don't want more

I don't need less

Even when I brush my hair or wear my lipstick I'll just imagine and believe its perfect

My hijab is nothing to worry

I could wear it within seconds while walking to the door before I go out

But today

I decided to stand straight in-front of the mirror

I decided to focus on every inch that has been blessed upon me

You know, by only standing in-front of the mirror could travel us through years back

Jumping from one moment to another

I realized I'm a lady now

I was reminded on how 10 years ago I used to stand in-front of the mirror talking to myself

Honestly that was how I developed my confidence

I used to imagine about the most random things

From trying to talk to my crush to going out on a date with him

Things I never did in real life not because I'm scared but because i don't see the need to

(the reason why my crush never knew i liked him)

I wore pretty clothes and walked in my sisters stilettos in-front of the mirror

As if I was a runaway model

That was 10 years back

When i looked at my legs and and eyebrows

My eyes and lips

It reminded me of my mother

It traveled me 7 years back

When I was only 12

I used to be around my mother all the time and people kept saying we look alike

I never agreed until today

I realized how I'm turning into her day by day

How she used to wear red lipstick

Thats how she looks when you see me trying to look elegant with some makeup on

My reflection didn't only remind me of her

I was also reminded of the moments during her last seconds of life

What she said

How she looked

I remember of all those things clearly when I look into the mirror

So I cried and I felt like hugging myself because I miss her too much

Now I know where to go when I miss you Ma.