Ku relakan diri dibasahi hujan asid
Mandi sungai hitam
Nafas udara tak seimbang molekulnya
Kerna itu satunya cara untukku berjabat dgn alam
Kalau untuk berjabat dengan alam punya pasal
Gunung pun aku daki
Bangun pagi tengok matahari kembali
Laut pun aku redah lah!
Terlalu kecil aku dimata-Nya untuk bayang berapa banyak tempat indah yang dicipta. Berjabatlah denganku alam, supaya aku tahu kebesaranNya.
Sunday, November 1, 2015
Hina
Ku rindu langit cerah, pepohon hijau
Dunia kini dah tak seindah dahulu
Tapi
Sehina-hina Dunia
Lebih hina yang merosakkannya.
Dunia kini dah tak seindah dahulu
Tapi
Sehina-hina Dunia
Lebih hina yang merosakkannya.
To The Forever Guy
If I could, I'd collect every coin thrown into lucky fountains all over the world & give them to you so you can hope again & stop being sad.
Copy every random love letters wrote, capture sceneries at unexpected places, for you to know that even if it's in B&W it's still beautiful.
I'd quote down every villain who got back up and turned phenomenal after something broke them, so you could also be a villain of your own.
Bring you around to find lonely old folks whose smile is more valuable than artificial teeth, so you know that being left alone could also bring happiness.
Drive you to a forgotten land with healthy soil, so we could plant flowers and watch them grow. So you know being dead could also give life.
Basically, I just want to make you feel alive again by showing you the same World that killed you.
If I ever get the chance to do so.
We could be villains babe, we go against darkness and screw up ghosts who haunted us.
Copy every random love letters wrote, capture sceneries at unexpected places, for you to know that even if it's in B&W it's still beautiful.
I'd quote down every villain who got back up and turned phenomenal after something broke them, so you could also be a villain of your own.
Bring you around to find lonely old folks whose smile is more valuable than artificial teeth, so you know that being left alone could also bring happiness.
Drive you to a forgotten land with healthy soil, so we could plant flowers and watch them grow. So you know being dead could also give life.
Basically, I just want to make you feel alive again by showing you the same World that killed you.
If I ever get the chance to do so.
We could be villains babe, we go against darkness and screw up ghosts who haunted us.
Sunday, October 25, 2015
MASK
Mask
I'm not sure if the happy or the depressed self
Is the mask I wear
I can't even differentiate which is which
Maybe they're both masks
Maybe I'm only a person made of nothingness
All these emotions are probably made up
They're all exagerration and lies
Maybe this is how this thing work
It's just like washing your face everyday before going to bed
You clean off your make up
You change it (your face) before you lie in bed
Sometimes you change into the self who loves to overthink messed up stuffs
Sometimes you turn into the imaginative self that won't let you sleep because it's trying to tell you something
But I don't know
Who is you?
You is I
And I am nobody.
I'm not sure if the happy or the depressed self
Is the mask I wear
I can't even differentiate which is which
Maybe they're both masks
Maybe I'm only a person made of nothingness
All these emotions are probably made up
They're all exagerration and lies
Maybe this is how this thing work
It's just like washing your face everyday before going to bed
You clean off your make up
You change it (your face) before you lie in bed
Sometimes you change into the self who loves to overthink messed up stuffs
Sometimes you turn into the imaginative self that won't let you sleep because it's trying to tell you something
But I don't know
Who is you?
You is I
And I am nobody.
Castle
In my heart
you are the King
you are the Prince
and all the Princesses
you rule every single pump my heart makes
you are the spirit
of my heartbeats
the monarch of the palace I build for you
is supreme
nobody else shall question
whether this is just a dream
but baby your heart
is only filled with black and white
no Kings
no Queens
no golden fortresses
just black or white
the color of the paint she coated your heart with
letting it dry until it hardens
not allowing me to see
if there's still chance for me
to build my own fortress there
since mine
is already filled with you.
GO WITH THE FLOW
So
Do you still blame those people who made you a murderer
Everytime you're about to kill an innocent person?
Do you still blame that person you used to love
Who left his sick virginity in you
Everytime you're about to fornicate with thirsty misogynist?
Do you still blame the night everything blasted and took away your smiles
Everytime you're about to light up your cheap coffin nail?
Do you still blame that girl
Who you thought was a bosom buddy
Who told the World about your darkest secrets
Everytime you humilIate someone?
Do you still blame the One who put a burdening life upon you so you could stand back up stronger
Everytime you don't even want to try change?
Do you still blame that teacher
Who failed your first Math paper
Everytime you're supposed to study to be successful?
Well you know what
Go with the flow
And blame everything.
Do you still blame those people who made you a murderer
Everytime you're about to kill an innocent person?
Do you still blame that person you used to love
Who left his sick virginity in you
Everytime you're about to fornicate with thirsty misogynist?
Do you still blame the night everything blasted and took away your smiles
Everytime you're about to light up your cheap coffin nail?
Do you still blame that girl
Who you thought was a bosom buddy
Who told the World about your darkest secrets
Everytime you humilIate someone?
Do you still blame the One who put a burdening life upon you so you could stand back up stronger
Everytime you don't even want to try change?
Do you still blame that teacher
Who failed your first Math paper
Everytime you're supposed to study to be successful?
Well you know what
Go with the flow
And blame everything.
Friday, October 23, 2015
Life Goes On
Life could screw you over when you can't even write a single word during a test
For you to get a kick in the butt to aim better
Life could mess up your day when you're very hungry and you can't find that restaurant you've been dying to go
For you to learn patience
Life could screw you over by taking away your loved ones
For you to realise there are other people that will be there for you
Life could mess you up when your car breaks down in the middle of the highway
For you to trust strangers that will restore your faith in humanity
Life is more than the bad things that happens
Life is for you to open your eyes
Life is to make you a better person everyday
Life might be mean
Only if you don't even want to get to know it
Life goes on
As long as you're still breathing
As long as you're still alive
Life goes on.
For you to get a kick in the butt to aim better
Life could mess up your day when you're very hungry and you can't find that restaurant you've been dying to go
For you to learn patience
Life could screw you over by taking away your loved ones
For you to realise there are other people that will be there for you
Life could mess you up when your car breaks down in the middle of the highway
For you to trust strangers that will restore your faith in humanity
Life is more than the bad things that happens
Life is for you to open your eyes
Life is to make you a better person everyday
Life might be mean
Only if you don't even want to get to know it
Life goes on
As long as you're still breathing
As long as you're still alive
Life goes on.
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
NUMB
I forgot what pain felt like
I forgot how painful it was to get paper cuts
When we get squeezed in between the elevator
Those bruises after hours of ice skating
Blisters from rocking new pumps the whole day
Trapped fingers when we closed the car doors
Stubbing that tiny toe into a wall
When our uterus contracts
Body aches after a week of camping
Sprained ankles
Accidentally cut flesh during manicure
Running into a signboard and get bumped foreheads
Scratching acne with long nails
Migraines from too much coffee
Swollen gums after getting our wisdom tooth pulled out
Accidentally biting your tongue chewing bubblegums
Skinned knees from skateboarding
And all the pains in life that you can imagine
I instantly forgot how they all felt like
After receiving that mail
Of your wedding tape and a bunch of pink carnations.
I forgot how painful it was to get paper cuts
When we get squeezed in between the elevator
Those bruises after hours of ice skating
Blisters from rocking new pumps the whole day
Trapped fingers when we closed the car doors
Stubbing that tiny toe into a wall
When our uterus contracts
Body aches after a week of camping
Sprained ankles
Accidentally cut flesh during manicure
Running into a signboard and get bumped foreheads
Scratching acne with long nails
Migraines from too much coffee
Swollen gums after getting our wisdom tooth pulled out
Accidentally biting your tongue chewing bubblegums
Skinned knees from skateboarding
And all the pains in life that you can imagine
I instantly forgot how they all felt like
After receiving that mail
Of your wedding tape and a bunch of pink carnations.
Self centered
You push people away.
You pushed people who listened to your rants at 2pm while in a lecture.
People who waited and read and responded to your 10minutes of typing on whatsapp.
People who
You warned about everyone leaving
And that they will get used to people like you
Then
They will be questioning your box of trust.
They would decide to not give a fuck anymore and leave
They would say you're just like those kids who do shit to attract attention.
They would say all these things,
To everyone else except you.
Because talking to you would be a waste of time
Putting an effort in a friendship with you is bullshit
Because people like you wants to be alone
So used to be alone
Pushing people away
Self centered
Insecure
Losing trust
Too afraid of being betrayed
Abnormal
Not living the life
They would leave and never come back
And they are going to have a beautiful life
Amazing friends
And you
Existed only to create friendships
And break them
And push everyone away
For them to be happier.
You pushed people who listened to your rants at 2pm while in a lecture.
People who waited and read and responded to your 10minutes of typing on whatsapp.
People who
You warned about everyone leaving
And that they will get used to people like you
Then
They will be questioning your box of trust.
They would decide to not give a fuck anymore and leave
They would say you're just like those kids who do shit to attract attention.
They would say all these things,
To everyone else except you.
Because talking to you would be a waste of time
Putting an effort in a friendship with you is bullshit
Because people like you wants to be alone
So used to be alone
Pushing people away
Self centered
Insecure
Losing trust
Too afraid of being betrayed
Abnormal
Not living the life
They would leave and never come back
And they are going to have a beautiful life
Amazing friends
And you
Existed only to create friendships
And break them
And push everyone away
For them to be happier.
Friday, October 16, 2015
Things I Want You To Answer
Do you ever hate a person so much you ended up liking them?
-January 2015
Is it fine to break promises to yourself or is it worst than any other promises broken?
-February 2015
Will it make me a psychopath for having a crush on the same person for 4 years?
-March 2015
Do you believe in virtual love at first sight(photo or something that person wrote)?
-April 2015
Do you think it's logical to fake feelings hoping it would turn out real?
-May 2015
What do you think of being in a relationship with a person but having dreams about another everyday?
-June 2015
Is it rational and fair to leave a person who loves you so much just because you want to stop hurting them?
-July 2015
Do you think I'm afraid of commitments or I'm just independent?
-August 2015
68% of me is a realist and the rest is hopeless romantic, is it possible?
-September 2015
What do we do when we feel like we are not good enough?
-October 2015
-January 2015
Is it fine to break promises to yourself or is it worst than any other promises broken?
-February 2015
Will it make me a psychopath for having a crush on the same person for 4 years?
-March 2015
Do you believe in virtual love at first sight(photo or something that person wrote)?
-April 2015
Do you think it's logical to fake feelings hoping it would turn out real?
-May 2015
What do you think of being in a relationship with a person but having dreams about another everyday?
-June 2015
Is it rational and fair to leave a person who loves you so much just because you want to stop hurting them?
-July 2015
Do you think I'm afraid of commitments or I'm just independent?
-August 2015
68% of me is a realist and the rest is hopeless romantic, is it possible?
-September 2015
What do we do when we feel like we are not good enough?
-October 2015
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